Now that i'm back to normal, i've returned to my nasty self.
Gotta keep my curtness and smartass remarks to myself.
Learning when to shut my mouth and try to listen more.
And not forgetting to keep the negativity away.
I think it's time to think abt the future and what to do with my life. Probably abit late but it's ok. I have'nt got down to realising my dreams of learning how to play the piano. Prbly shld get the piano first.
I also am thinking about doing some community work. Giving abit of myself to make others happier, I guess would accumulate a bit of good karma on one hand and improve the life of the other.
I wanna improve myself. Surely there must be more that I can offer to this world?
Jus need to make baby steps...
Growing up kinda scares me still...
Labels: My grand plans
Everythings fine now...
I'm ok. =)
I'm not ready. because I'm not content. I want more. So as not to regret.
So that I can trust myself for life.
If one day i ever end up hurt you, pls forgive me.
Labels: unsure
Trying to scramble outta my little shell. Somehow i got lost.
I think it went down hill when I lost all remnants of my confidence and perhaps a little of my sanity. The thought of standing infront of a moving vehicle to avoid my circumstance did cross my mind.
The notion that there's no way out of my circumstances was so overpowering. And a big blow came when I felt that even my Lord has forsaken me.
I cannot confidently say I'm out but at least i feel alive. For starters, I feel irritation now, whereas in the past, majority of the time the feeling was of constant sorrow. Everything let to despondent thinking. The good thing was nothing could faze me, simply because there was nothing that could arouse my interest. No happiness, no anger, no excitement. I didn't feel like doing anything, i didn't feel like going anywhere, which would explain my disappearance on practically everyone's map. And my lost of personality and objective in life.
Perhaps i may slip again and each time will be tougher for me to get out. But for now, while i am still in ctrl i can document what I went through and hopefully reading back would allow me to get out of it.Everything you do and say will affect The Lives of Others.
I must rant that the stupid stereotype that administrative ppl have it easy and are not impt is for starters discriminatory and shows ignorance. I don't know how hard it is for you and you don't know how hard it is for me. So unless u've done my exact scope of work dun give me shit abt it being easy.
Feels nice to say 'shit' again.
Labels: baiganjiaoji
It's hard to be optimistic nowadays.
Still trying to find my purpose and drive in life.
Another day...
While I'm feeling abit better, I shall remind myself that there is more to life than work. I should be content and make the best out of it.
Happy chinese niu year everyone!
Labels: Contemplative
I'm tired and unhappy.
Stupid place.
Labels: grumble
My new year resolutions are... still pending.
I know they're along the lines of health, happiness and kindness.
Labels: My grand plans
Currently, suffering from withdrawal symptoms due to lack of pork. =(
Labels: Crappy
What you are is God's gift to you.
What you become is your gift to God...ain't tt nice?
Be positive. Be positive. Be positive.
My mantra for the month.
Labels: Contemplative
Tomorrow is a new beginning...
I hope everything works out okay.
Labels: unsure