Saturday, October 28, 2006
It's eating me up inside.Confused.
Confused.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Sleep. I need.eyes are getting smaller than small.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
What am i doing!?!!!?!!!!!?So not in control. Rawr!
Friday, October 20, 2006
It's scary.We make decisions everyday tt freaks us out.
If everything is scary can i jus push a button tt allows me to stay in this point in my life forever? A rewind button would be nice too.
But the next time i would say i wanna get back to this spot so wads the pt of rewinding. makes sense? no? nvm.
Lousy decisions made. I don't wanna make bad decisions.
But if this fell into my lap, does it mean I have to just take it and see what happens.
it will lead me somewhere.
Prbably 10 yrs down the road... I'd be... not here.
Call.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Demoralised.low.
headache.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
So i'm included only when I'm needed. Jus spiffy u know.
I don't say alot of thing that I should have said.
But i am in no position to complain. am i?
If someone apologizes profusely, I feel very bad for being unable to think "it's alright."
It becomes my fault. why do i feel like it's always my fault.
yes. no. yes. no. yes no. yes. no.
no no no no... we're done.
lala's right. we learn alot from the tele.
I love my tele. It's my best friend.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Dear Blog,I want to say tt i'm tired.
N i neva seem to be able to have that energy no matter how much I sleep. Is there something wrong with me?
I need more time. But who doesn't?
I haven't been managing my time properly. I'm trying.
If I try a little bit harder do you think it will work out? I doubt so.
My head is bloated. Leave my mind alone.
Today i wished I didn't have to wake up.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
I spend hours doing something that don't matter.I spend my waking hours waiting for something that won't happen.
I walk around hoping that a miracle would appear but it doesn't.
But i still do it... jaded.
Everyday my resolve gets broken.
Today, it happened just because of a paragraph of words. N I was so confident about doing it after last week's chat. poo.
I understand that I have not grown up.
But somehow it just keeps me awake. A weird sorta reserve that the body taps tt's inexhaustable till I close my eyes and turn off the lights.
Saturday, October 07, 2006
I'm getting lame.My sense of humour has gone frm wry to stupid.
Even i dun like what i'm thinking and saying.
What's happening?!? N i'm finding harder n harder to express myself.
I want it back. Gimme.
I just wanna let go...
when the interest is not there anymore, it's hard to put in effort.
when i feel disheartened. i'm finding easier to be numb. To act dumb. To suck thumb.
Oh crap. me n my stupid mind.
pros n cons.
I wanna say i dun really care. But i don't have much of a choice.
I think i'm jus going through a phase where i accept anything tt comes my way as being fated and unchangeable. ren ming.