Sunday, September 21, 2003

When u feel all troubled n messed up, sometimes u forget the pple ard u. The friends tt care, the friends tt get affected because of the brooding. When u come back n think abt it maybe u'll realise tt it isn't worth it, it isn't worth all the pain n suffering. It isn't worth their pain n suffering. Perhaps when u finally realise all this they'll b long gone.
I wonder whether we're still friends, whether wad i said to u mattered, whether i matter at all. It's selfish to think this way, not now, not at this time, but i can't help it. I so much want to show my care n concern but i can't cos i think it won't help n i guess u won't need it. I'm sorry i sounded irritated but i reallie was n i won't hide it, i was disappointed. Disappointed by my own interpretation and inference of events, upset tt it can neva b like b4. I'm still wondering wad happened, how did it turn out this way? Yet, i guess i dun want to know, it might make me feel worse. I understand wad u mean by u're trying hard, cos i'm trying hard too, once in a while it bugs me at night, i can't sleep n crying doesn't help any longer. It just keeps me awake. I thought if i kept quiet abt it, it will go away someday, but it hasn't. Maybe it will but not yet. I don't understand y it happens, i wish it will stop. I'm sorry i didn't tell u when u asked. I didn't tell u tt it still hurts.

by tab at 1:02 AM |